Let me be as if I never existed

Standing on the topic of the roof, I feel light. I feel as light as a leaf - dead yellow leaf.

No sap & no possibility of regaining any. End is inevitable. Not sure if it will ever restart again.

Standing at the top, I feel like dropping off myself & float in the air for sometime before I finally fall on the earth.

Feel like breathing in this cold, wild air & breathe out the moist ugly air in me.

Wish to fly like a kite with no strings attached.

Wish to count the trees, look up in the sky for hours at once & sleep on the grass when I can stare no more. Directionless & purposeless like a feather in the air.

Why not let the destiny decide my fate.

Why should I trouble myself then by bothering about whats gona happen tomorrow.

Instead of looking from a window, why not go out in the rain & soak myself in the sap – sap which could help me live.

Let me be spineless & never able to stand.

Let me crawl like an insect but stay close to the earth.

Let me be soil instead & drench my thirst when it rains.

Let me be something insignificant & invisible.

Let me stand at one corner & stay unnoticed.

Let me be as if I never existed.